Because Bucky Said
by greypilgrim127
Summary: All the Avengers used to think that Bucky was the one who got Steve in trouble, and that Steve was, in fact, a gutless chicken. However, within a few days they realized it was quite a different story...


**This was inspired by the muse of Avenger fanfic writers...Tumblr. Anyway I got the idea from darkblade1163 and a tumblr post. Enjoy! And reviews make Thor happy. **

It was a well-known fact that Steve Rogers, the great Captain America, the great soldier-out-of-time was a chicken.

Yes, Steve was a big, fat chicken. He was that boring person who always picked truth, or the person who always said: "Tony, I don't think that's a good idea" or "Nope. I refuse to be part of this madness" and always the one who wet-blanketed the billionaire's genius ideas.

So poor Steve as usually picked on for his lack of manliness and his gutless-ness. UNTIL he brought James Buchannan Barnes to live at Stark Tower as well.

Granted, it had been seventy years since Steve had become a big muscle-y, dreamy super soldier, but Bucky still felt the need to hover over and mother Steve. (Which was a little weird, since Steve was the most motherly of all the Avengers).

However, Bucky was the awesome, chill one who was always up for a dare or a prank. At least, that's who everyone thought he was.

* * *

Tony walked into the kitchen to get himself a drink. He didn't really pay attention to Steve and Bucky sitting at the table looking at a bunch of old photographs.

"I still think the forty's hairstyles were better." Steve said.

"Nah." Bucky replied, "It was too puffy then!"

"Oh, oh here's a good one. That was the time someone flipped me off the slide at school. Good times."

"It wasn't cool." Bucky said between his teeth, "People shouldn't pick on kids smaller than them."

"Let it go, Buck. That was over seventy years ago!"

Tony could never get used to hearing that.

"Oh, that was when someone dared me to eat a worm."

"I told you not to, but did you listen? Nooooo. And then guess who got a stomach ache afterwards? You did."

Tony stopped short on his way to the fridge. "Wait…you're telling me that Capsicle was the crazy one in school and Snowflakes wasn't?"

"Yeah, I had to watch out for him." Bucky said, "And stop calling me Snowflakes!"

"But….but…!" Tony spluttered.

"He was such a little guy." Bucky explained, "Seriously."

"There were other guys eating worms. It wasn't really about _me._" Steve protested, "I had no right to do any less than them."

"Riiiggghhht." Bucky sighed, "Cause you had nothin' to prove."

"THIS IS A SCIENTIFIC BREAK THROUGH!" Tony shouted, throwing his hands up in the air.

"That wasn't just it." Steve added, "Bucky usually got dragged into all the crazy stuff I did. Because of his mothering tendencies."

"It was not motherly! It was called protectiveness." Bucky began.

But Steve was getting excited. "Because you always just feel this urge to go do stuff when someone's falling you around all the time like: "Steve don't do it. No Steve, it's a bad idea. Oh my word, that's a horrible idea Steve! Don't jump out of the plane without a parachute Steve, don't pick a fight with the bully, Steve!'"

"I don't talk like that." Bucky grumbled. "And the worst part was that I usually ended up getting in trouble too!"

But Tony was gone. He was racing down to Banner's room as fast as he could.

"Bruce! Bruce! Brucey! Wake up! Wakey, wakey, wakey!" he bawled, hammering on the doctor's door, "I have this wonderful idea!"

"What?" Banner growled, yanking the door open.

"Steve is not the gutless chicken we all believed him to be!" Tony exclaimed jubilantly.

Loki suddenly materialized beside Tony, making the billionaire jump (in a very manly way). "Chickens are actually not cowardly by nature, but can become very protective of their young when provoked—" he started to read from a book.

"Save it, Reindeer Games." Tony cut through. "Banner, I propose a challenge war!"

"I'm listening." Banner said wearily.

"Whoever can get Steve to do the dumbest thing wins. Because, I mean, we know he's got it in him."

Loki cocked an eyebrow in interest. This was a challenge worth his time. With his manipulation skills, he could win! "What is the reward for this…contest?" he asked.

Tony shrugged. "We can place bets."

"That's not fair!" Clint cawed from the air vents. "You're rich!"

"Is too, fair! Y'all are living in my house for free."

There was no answer from the vent.

"Okay it's settled." Tony gleefully clapped his hands together. "May the best man win!"

* * *

Banner, despite the fact that he was probably too smart and mature to play such a dumb game, was highly intrigued by the fact that Steve was not a ball-less coward. He walked in what he hoped was a nonchalant fashion into the kitchen. Steve was trying to figure out how to use an ipod (a hilarious thing to watch) and Bucky was reading.

"Hey Rogers." Banner said.

"Morning, Dr. Banner." Steve said, frowning at the ipod. "Can I ask you a quick question?"

"Sure."

"How do you play this song?"

"Um…" Bruce clicked play.

"Oh, oh thank you."

"So, Steve, have you ever…um….prank called someone?"

"Nope."

"Ever?"

"Nope."

"Will you ever?"

"Nope."

"Really?"

"Yep."

"Oh."

Awkward silence. Bucky looked up a little suspiciously.

"Just wondering." Banner said nervously. "I think you should make your first prank call."

"Nope." Steve said again. "It's rude and childish. And a waste of time!"

Banner sighed and retreated from the kitchen, defeated. Clint watched from an air vent, cackling a little to himself.

Bucky sighed. "Sounds like the type of thing you would do when you were younger."

"Huh?" Steve said.

"You know? The stupid game where you rang someone's doorbell and then ran away? And I kept telling you not to?"

"Oh. Oh yeah!" Steve said distantly, staring at the kitchen phone now. "Those were good times….."

Bucky followed his gaze. "Steve? What? NO. No, Steve. That's a bad idea. Very bad idea, Steve!"

Steve sat up. "I'm gonna do it! I'm gonna make a prank call. See, Buck, I know how to handle the twenty first century!"

"Steve, I will kill you if you…."

"I'll call…..Pepper." Steve said, cautiously dialing a number. "Hello? Ms. Potts? Yeah, I have a question. How did I get away from Iraq? Iran! Ha-ha…get it? I ran!"

Bucky facepalmed. Meanwhile, in the airvent, Cliint crawled away.

* * *

"Guess what?" Tony shouted, bouncing into the kitchen. "We are going to play dodgeball, okay?"

"What is this dodging of balls game?" Thor asked, confused.

Everyone else cracked up. Tony threw a dodgeball at Thor, who caught it in surprise.

"Friend Tony, why did you throw this at me?"

"That's how you play the game. You throw 'em at people and they have to dodge."

Thor's face lit up like a Christmas tree. "Oh! I understand! That is why it is called dodge-the-ball!"

Loki looked up from a computer. "According to this site that is called Wikipedia, DodgeBall: A True Underdog Story, commonly referred to as DodgeBall, is a 2004 American sports comedy film produced by 20th Century Fox and Red Hour Productions, written and directed by Rawson Marshall Thurber and starring Vince Vaughn and Ben Stiller."

"That's the film, buddy. Not the game." Natasha said.

"Mewling quim." Loki muttered.

"So, let's go down to the gym and play!" Tony squealed like a little child. "And Banner, no hulking out!"

"Tony!" Pepper scolded.

They split up into teams. One side consisting of Tony, Steve, Bucky, and Loki. The other team was Clint, Natasha and Banner and Thor. Pepper was the referee. When Banner started to complain about having Thor on his team, everyone said it was only fair, because they got Clint.

"Hey! Steve!" Tony hissed.

"What?"

"When we start, I want you to nail 'Tasha on the head with a dodgeball, okay?"

"What? Why would I do that?" Steve began.

"That's the dumbest idea ever." Bucky broke in, "You should never hit a woman on the head with a dodgeball!"

"Technically she's an assassin." Tony reasoned.

"Even better reason not to! She'd kill you!"

"I'm gonna do it." Steve said, grabbing a dodgeball. "I'm gonna hit the Black Widow on the head!"

"Are you guys ready?" Clint shouted.

"Yeah, we're good!" Tony shouted.

Pepper blew her whistle.

Clint immediately knocked Loki and Bucky out, while Tony hit Thor, who shouted: "HELP! These balls of terror are ATTACKING me!"

Steve threw his dodgeball at Natasha. And it nailed her right in the head. There was complete silence in the gym.

"Who threw that?" Natasha demanded.

Tony pointed at Steve.

"RUN STEVE, RUN!" Clint shrieked.

Steve ran.

* * *

So far Tony was the only one who had gotten any money from betting on Steve. And it was just five dollars from Banner, for the whole dodgeball incident. But by now, Natasha ad Thor had also joined in with the betting.

The six Avengers and Loki were sitting in the kitchen now, discussing their meager attempts at tricking Steve.

"I did get him to hit Natasha in the head." Tony declared proudly.

"I tried to get him to prank call someone, but it never worked." Bruce said sadly.

"I tried to dare him to eat one of my Tarts of Pop, but he refused." Thor added.

Loki slapped a fifty dollar bill on the table. "I believe I can make Steve eat a tube of toothpaste."

"Where's Bucky?" Clint suddenly demanded.

"He's not home." Natasha replied, "Why?"

"No reason." Clint said.

"BROTHER I accept your bet!" Thor said, happily dreaming of the pop tarts he could buy.

Loki sniggered and left the room, confident that Thor would soon be paying up.

He returned half an hour later, scowling frostily (pun intended).

"He wouldn't do it." he snapped.

"YES!" Thor cheered, snatching up the bill, "I HAVE WON!"

"I cannot believe that mortal would not listen to me." Loki sulked away to read the Encyclopedia Britannica.

* * *

The stakes had gotten higher and higher. Even Hill and Fury had joined in the madness of trying to make Steve make a fool of himself. Natasha dared Steve to eat a cold can of pickled lettuce. Bucky told him not to, and Natasha won three hundred dollars off Stark. Banner dared Steve to balance a chemical equation, and lost seventy five cents to Thor.

Hill dared Steve to make a Vine video of himself singing "Baby" by Justin Beiber. Bucky strongly voiced his distaste of the idea, and Hill one a thousand dollars off Fury, much to the directors chagrin.

The only one who had not yet placed or taken a bet was Clint. Not that anyone noticed. (Technically Coulson hadn't either, but that was because Coulson did not believe that his almighty hero Captain America really needed to be DARED to do anything).

But one night, when Fury had won nine thousand dollars off Loki and Natasha together (the two ended up groveling on the floor and Fury relented and instead made them bring him coffee each morning and run personal errands for the next month) Clint decided it was time.

"I bet ten thousand dollars that I can make Steve jump off the roof." Clint said bravely.

Everyone was sitting on the roof of Stark Tower, enjoying the evening. Bucky and Steve were reading, fully unaware of the furious betting going on.

There was a shocked silence.

"Ten thousand DOLLARS?" Thor boomed, "Are you sure you do not mean ten thousand PENNIES, friend Eye of Hawk?"

"I'm sure." Clint said, nodding.

"Clint…" Natasha began.

"I'll take it." Tony smirked. "I will take this bet!"

Hill shrugged. "It's not like it's gonna cost him anything."

"Though if you lose, Legolas, and you can't pay up, you're gonnna be my personal servant for the rest of your life!" Tony chuckled.

"Deal." Clint said, and walked towards Steve and Bucky. "Hey cap, you ever think about jumping off the roof?"

"Can't say that I have." Steve said, without looking up.

"Really?" Clint asked, "Because I think you could make it to the next building over."

"Probably could," said Steve, "But I know what you're doing. I'm not gonna try."

"Damn right you're not." Bucky muttered.

Steve set down his book. "You know what?" he said, standing, "There's only one way to know for sure. Guys, I'm gonna jump off the roof."

Shocked silence.

"Steve!" Bucky complained, "That's the worst idea ever! I swear, I'm gonna kill you if you do it. STEVE! Don't do it!"

"I'm gonna do it!" Steve took a running jump and…..

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" he barely made it to the other roof.

Bucky peeked out between his fingers. "Is it over?" he squeaked. (It was a very manly squeak).

"In your FACE, Stark!" Clint crowed, "Pay UP loseeerrrrr!"

Tony growled to himself, while Natasha and Hill burst out laughing. Suddenly Coulson burst out of the door.

"Captain! Yes! I know you could do it!" He cheered. Then he turned to Fury. "That's two hundred bucks, director. I told you he could make it!"

Fury furiously paid Coulson. Meanwhile, in the distance, everyone could hear Bucky.

"Steve, I said no! Look, you could have gotten killed. Geez, the things I have to live through! It was a very bad idea! You're never going to ever do that again! Steve! I SAID DON'T DO IT AGAIN! NO STEEEEVVVEEEE!"


End file.
